“Free Candy”

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Decades ago, my favorite TV show was “The A-Team”, and I’m not sure why. Maybe it was because I love action movies. Maybe it was because I loved the idea of this motley foursome stepping in with their military know-how to fight the battles of people who could not fight for themselves. My favorite characters were Murdock—because he was that fun kind of crazy—and Hannibal, because he had some of the best lines during a firefight.

I remember one episode where he told the guest-star-bad-guy, “You’re like bread on the windowsill….mine when I want you.” That line stayed with me more than whatever took place in the rest of the episode, which I will never remember. I even wrote it down so that I wouldn’t forget it.

“You’re like bread on the windowsill….mine when I want you.”

There are men who really think like that.

Fast-forward to the present. Domestic violence. Sexual harassment. Sexual misconduct. Sexual molestation. Women being insulted, groped, fondled, beaten, shot, and even killed because they dared to reject a man’s advances. This neanderthal behavior points to a very simple (yet jacked-up!) premise that many men have learned from *somewhere*: every woman is accessible. Any man can have any woman he wants, regardless of what he looks like or how many social skills he may or may not possess, and she doesn’t get to say no to him or even act like she is not interested. She is there to be his when he wants her. Like bread on the windowsill.

Mm-hmm.

Now, while I understand the meaning of the phrase, I don’t think that people like bread enough to get the point, so I’ll coin a phrase of my own:

Free candy.

Think about it. When we see candy sitting there, sweet and appealing not belonging to anybody, our greedy nature is inclined to snatch up a handful of it, just because it’s there. We might not even like the kind of candy that’s available, but you’re going to take a piece of whatever’s in there because it IS available. You’re here…it’s here for you….just take what you want whenever you want it. Right?

Entitlement in a nutshell.

Apparently, many men on this earth feel inclined to force their base appetites on a woman with the same piggish attitude. I’m here….she’s here for me….I can devour her whenever I want her, just because I want her. She’s nothing more than free candy.

As disgraceful as it is to have to say this in 2017, that attitude is absolute bullcrap. WOMEN ARE NOT FREE CANDY. We have our own brains, our own bodies, our own sexual inclinations, and our own free will. We do not exist solely for your pleasure. We should be able to voice our disinterest and/or displeasure to a man without being belittled, lashed out at, or physically endangered.


Men are not entitled to put their hands (or anything else of theirs) on every woman that they see, and women have a right to say NO by any means necessary (I prefer sharp objects, myself).

Did I make that clear enough? Any questions? Comments? Bring them to me. I’m ready for you.


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